365 Deployment Days: A Wife's Survival Story follows a military wife's experiences during her husband's deployment to Iraq. Filled with laughter, tears, and everything in between, 365 Deployment Days explores the wide-ranging emotions brought about by a loved one's deployment. Through self-exploration Sara Dawalt learns the skills necessary to cope and make sense of her li365 Deployment Days: A Wife's Survival Story follows a military wife's experiences during her husband's deployment to Iraq. Filled with laughter, tears, and everything in between, 365 Deployment Days explores the wide-ranging emotions brought about by a loved one's deployment. Through self-exploration Sara Dawalt learns the skills necessary to cope and make sense of her life during a period of turmoil....
|Title||:||365 Deployment Days: A Wife's Survival Story|
|Number of Pages||:||127 Pages|
|Status||:||Available For Download|
|Last checked||:||21 Minutes ago!|
365 Deployment Days: A Wife's Survival Story Reviews
Very disappointing! The rambelings of this author are annoying, and her suggestions will not work for all military wives. Additionally, her feelings are not something all military wives will go through, however she assumes all military wives are feeling this miserable and weak. She endures 1 deployment, which admittedly the first is the hardest, and provides her insight to her feelings and experience durring that time. A military wife who reads this book MAY be able to relate to some of these feelings, finding comfort that she is not alone, however there are much better resources out there. I've been through deployments and trust me I understand it is difficult, but you don't have to go into a complete depression while your spouse is away. The book is an entire pity party; she goes on to say how horrible it is that she has to send her hubsband items he needs, take out the trash, etc. I often look for resources for military wives dealing with deployment and this is one I recommend wives NOT read. Find something that will be helpful and uplifting. Something that empowers you and gives helpful hints and tips. Additionally, the title misleads one to beleive that this is about a year of deployment, or a devotional, or how to get through each day; it is none of those things but rather a hundred something pages (a few pages a chapter) about the author's personal experience.
The writing in this book is poor, like someone transcribed a person's rambling straight from tape recorder to paper. The book is not, as the title suggests, a journey through the 365 days. It is a loose collection of thoughts organized into 40 topics. Each topic is a chapter and includes things like "routines," "lack of sleep," and "the post office." Chapters are 2-4 pages long.The book is mostly complaining. I don't mean to suggest that she should've had a stiff upper lip or that there isn't plenty to complain about. But complaining, by itself, is just not that helpful a read. Since the book seems mostly to showcase her misery and I am looking for these books to try to avoid or minimize misery, I just fought with her for the whole book, looking for anything and everything that she did to make it worse that surely I wouldn't do. I wanted to ask, "You watched your friends and neighbors deploy for two years before it was your husband's turn, working yourself into illness from the anticipation, and never asked any of them what it's like or for advice of any kind?" What I want are some insights, some wish-I'd-knowns, some Lessons Learned, some reassurances. Chapter Three comes close with three sentences addressing how to do it differently. Here it is in its tiny entirety:"The evening of Brandon's deployment began with dropping off his bags at the truck at ten o'clock at night. This was followed by the issuing of his weapon and neither of us being allowed to leave the barracks area. We had four hours of time to sit and wait. Waiting for something awful to happen is about the worst feeling in the world -like you know someone is about to rip your heart out, and you have no strength to stop it from happening."We sat in silence most of the time, numb and sad all at once. It was hard to look at his face, because if I did, I would see his tears. I knew seeing that would make me cry, and I couldn't let that happen, because I thought I wouldn't be able to stop."After a torturous four hours of knowing the end was near, the soldiers had a formation to make sure everyone was accounted for and to check their carry-on bags to make sure they were the correct size. There I stood, all alone, struggling to see my husband in the crowd of men standing in rows and blocks and coming forward one by one to place their bag in the box on the ground at the front of the formation. Five hundred people checking their carry-on bags took an almost intolerable amount of time away from the time we had left together. I wanted to jump out of my skin with frustration. I kept looking around, hoping I would see someone I knew so I would at least have someone to talk to, but there wasn't anyone. I couldn't control what was going on, and I couldn't be with my husband. I just had to watch him from afar."I can't figure out what she's doing there, why she isn't allowed to leave (I assume she means that he's not allowed to leave and that she is unwilling to leave him), why they haven't already had their goodbye, why she doesn't know a single person there after having been in this community for a few years, and why she thinks, after he's been issued his weapon and they're being processed, they still have "time together." But continuing:"Following the bag-checking fiasco, Brandon and I were granted some more time together at the gym, where we would eventually have to say goodbye. Every time someone walked to the microphone to make an announcement, my heart sank. Over and over random announcements were made, but not the announcement telling everyone to say their final good-byes. Fighting back the tears that were threatening to spill in front of hundreds of strangers who were feeling the same despair and helplessness as me was overwhelming, and I felt like I was drowning. I had hit my breaking point. I looked at Brandon, and feeling that I just couldn't take this long, drawn-out good-bye anymore, I asked him to walk me to the car."Once we were at the car, I broke down in heaving sobs. I couldn't even talk to say good-bye. We both cried and finally said good-bye. But then, as he started to walk inside to spend his last few minutes alone, I stopped him. Knowing that this time together, even though it felt rotten, might be our last (after all, he was going to war, not just an extended vacation), I couldn't let him go. I went back into the gym and endured more cheerful band music (as if we were at a parade and not the most awful day of my life!). Brandon and I sat in the bleachers full of strangers and held each other. That's all we could do, there were no more words to be spoken."I understand not wanting to say goodbye. No one wants to do it dropping off their significant other at the airport at the end of leave or for deployment or to end the rare, miraculous overseas phone call during deployment. Making the move to say goodbye sucks. I also understand wanting to hold each other as long as you can. But anyone would give themselves an ulcer with all this focus on "last times," especially in the military when you're kept in suspense as to when the exact last moment is going to be. You cannot slow time down or make it more vivid or squeeze more out of it by calling it a "last" anything. Just hold each other and stay in the moment, in the present, and pay as little mind as possible to what's coming next. Fixating on when the shoe is going to drop and the impermanence of your togetherness is how she spent the last two years in misery, fighting with her spouse and detaching from him way, way in advance."Finally at 3:30 in the morning -that's right, 3:30 a.m.- the announcement was made for the soldiers to say their final good-byes and to line up. Brandon and I held hands and kissed good-bye. As the soldiers were lining up, I started my numb walk to the car."While we were in the gym, a terrible fog had rolled in. I could barely see the road in front of me, and I could not see the sides of the road at all. Kind of fitting -like driving into a horror movie- and not the best way to set up my next year alone. A drive that should have found me safely in my bed in ten minutes took nearly twenty because I couldn't safely drive any faster. I only found my way home because of a storage place with neon lights blazing through the fog across the street from my neighborhood. Everything was eerily quiet."As I entered my house, it hit me. I was alone. Totally, completely, and utterly alone, and there was nothing I could do about it. Feeling like I couldn't breathe, I sat down on my bed and tried to steady myself. I felt the overwhelming urge to talk to someone, anyone, to decompress and rant about the unbelievable night I had just experienced. I felt so many emotions that I thought I was going to explode, but who do you call at four in the morning? No one I knew. I think I probably could have called anyone and they would have grudgingly talked to me, but I would have added feeling rotten for waking them up to the plethora of emotions I was already experiencing. Instead I huddled up with my dog, cried, and tried to sleep.Two possibilities for phone calls: 1. A spouse in the area whose husband also just deployed. 2. Since the author is in Texas but from North Carolina, she could call someone in North Carolina because it would be 6 a.m. there."If I had that night to do over, I would have said good-bye to Brandon at home, on my terms. I would not have tortured myself with saying goodbye for hours. That horrific experience almost did me in, and my year away from him hadn't even started! Or if I were going to go with him to the gym to say good-bye, I would make sure there was someone there to drive me home and to be with me afterward so I wouldn't have to deal with my feelings and Brandon's deployment alone. With my yearlong battle just beginning, I was losing the war of emotions already. No one should have to be as brave as I tried to be that night."I don't know about brave, but certainly not as naive and uninformed. If she were a long-distance wife, if he had just joined a few months ago, I could understand the cluelessness, but they've been married and living together for a few years, in the military the entire time, when he finally deploys.In all, there is just too little distance, perspective, or insight for me to recommend this book to anyone. I can't take her seriously when she writes, "Thankfully I never had to deal with the big guilt -the missed phone call that was my husband's last. That was, in fact, one of my worst fears while Brandon was deployed. I don't think I would ever have been able to forgive myself if I had missed a phone call from Brandon and he had died before I got to talk to him again." It's a configuration of events that certainly would sound poignantly tragic in a work of fiction or on the news, but it's ironic small potatoes compared to missing the "last" two years of married life before he deployed by being a hysterical, raging mess over the possibility of him deploying.Get Surviving Deployment by Pavlicin or The Homefront Club by Eckhart or the audio book These Boots (from militaryonesource.com) or even just visit milspouse.com instead. Anything else.---------------------An excerpt from While They're At War------Most families aren't there for the final departure. It doesn't matter whether the date is long-planned, like Frank's first deployment, or on short notice like this one. A lot of spouses and lovers and parents drop off the one in uniform and leave right away; many, many more don't come at all. I never understood why until that night at the barracks, while we waited in the rain for the buses. Around midnight, I overheard a young Marine ask an officer, hopefully, "Can we send our wives home now?" He was looking for a direct order so he wouldn't have to be the bad guy. For him, for most in fact, being surrounded by what you're leaving behind makes walking away from it that much harder.Instead of the 365 Days goodbye, I want the goodbye from While They're At War (Chapter 2).
I read this book while my husband was on his first deployment. I had hoped that it would help me grow or feel better/stronger. All it did for me was realize that I never want to be whiny like this woman. I finished the book mainly because it was short, I still felt as if I wasted part of my life reading it though. I do not recommend this book. If you need a laugh or pick me up about deployment this is not it.
This book was not what I was hoping. Rather, it was very simply written and poorly organized. The chapters blended together and Dawalt repeated herself ex) lack of sleep in at least five chapters. It is a fast read however, and may be good for people who just want to read someone's account/rant of being without their spouse, but does not give helpful advice, per se. I would give 1.5 stars if I could. Read "Married to the Military" instead.
This was an excellent book. As a girlfriend, I'd recommend it to any army girlfriend. Mrs. Dawalt gave a good description of the types of emotions you go through and opened my eyes about things. I cried, laughed and couldn't put the book down.
I enjoyed this book too on the count of one wife's story and what she went through during her trying times alone away from her husband. It's not easy to get by during deployments, but through this woman's story I find that you can do your own soul searching during those hard times.
This book would be better for someone on their first deployment. Not written well and it gets annoying. Every chapter is a new topic; she rambles then sums it up.